With friends like these, who needs an uninhabited bomb testing range?

The French planted the Niger Uranium forged documents, used as part of the administration's case for war. Apparently they did it so that we'd make the case for war, then discover the documents were fake, thereby undermining the case for war.

In true French fashion, when we didn't discover it in time, they promptly and honorably disclosed the fact that they forged the documents and thereby saved us from invading Iraq, which could have been a disaster.

Oh, wait...

Why do we pretend as if these cowardly, lying, back-stabbing people are our allies? They plant these documents in order to stop the war, and then when we don't go along with their brilliant Cluseau-ian plan, they turn their heads and pretend they didn't do it, and let us tromp into Baghdad. I guess they were only opposed to the war in as much as it could make us look silly, not so much concerned about the thousands of people that would die.

So far, the French have not acknowledged this story sent to me by my news-junkie uncle. I will be interested to see how they attempt to turn this into another opportunity for self-righteousness.

On a serious note, the French are helping on Syria, but of course the murdered Hariri was a close personal friend of Jacque Chirac. They have single handedly scuppered the Doha round of world trade talks by refusing the U.S. proposal to lower farm subsidies (agreed for negotiations by the British presidency of the EU) thereby keeping the poorest people in the world safely in starvation so that they can continue to bilk the EU for farm subsidies.

Hyperbole aside, how is it that America has such an awful reputation, while people by and large admire the French? Superior diplomacy. Culture which smiles at niceities, and does not require strength or machismo. There is something to be learned here. This is the same reason why Clinton was so popular: feel-good rhetoric. Republicans are very bad at it, as are conservatives in general.

Look to the race for Tory leadership in the U.K. The conservatives have learned from the Blair dominance, see Gordon Brown as weak in the charm department, and just may pick David Cameron to be their leader. Very smart. He is sharp enough, but completely untested. His advantage? Charisma. He knows how to say nice things that people will believe.

The truth is that if you can merely convince people that you can turn the air into cotton candy, they will like you. If the sugar puffs don't appear, convince them that it is someone else's fault. This is diplomacy French style. This is the secret to leftist populism (as opposed to doom and xenophobia of rightist populism).

The American right could use some French lessons.

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